Dear Mr. Ebli-
Thank you so much for travelling to Ohio this past Thanksgiving. Thank you for being the kind of friend who does not shy away from a friend who is ill. Thank you for coming and doing all the cooking on Thanksgiving. Thank you for coming despite the fact I'd been up all night hurling. Thank God it was food poisoning and not the flu so you and your family did not get ill. Thank you for reminding me of your great gift of simple joy. You were simply the most joy filled person I've ever known. You enjoyed and shared simple fun with us.- Great conversation, stringing popcorn and cranberries, purusing recipes, pictures, reminiscing, laughter, games, good food, singing, a love for nature and animals. I have always appreciated your love for your wife and children. Your love was steadfast and it bore many things. I was glad to hear the story of how your family started. I will miss you when I get to the farm, but I know that your legacy and your influence will linger just like an oriental iris' scent even after one walks away from it. I will see you and Beauregard when I get to heaven (and I hope that is later than sooner). See you on the other side. Enjoy as you enter into Christ's rest.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Mother's Day
Cruisin Cubbie came home with an assignment for Mother's Day. He was to answer the prompts
How tall is your Mom? 165 feet tall. Pretty tall about 3 times taller than his Dad who measured in at 55 feet tall.
What does your mom tell you all the time? "Feed the Dog"....I was hoping for "I love you"
When your mom shops what does she like to buy? "Food" Evident we only grocery shop together.
Your Mom's favorite movie and music? Kung fu Panda and Who let the dogs out.
What is your Dad's favorite song? He doesn't sing.
What do you like to do most with your mom? Watch TV (I never knew this)
What do your parents like to cook? Mom-Cheese pizza, Dad-peas
What is your Dad's favorite dessert? Warm ice Cream
What is your Dad's favorite Drink? Milk
Dancing cubbie said, "I think he got confused about Dad and answered his own favorites>" I do say I agree with her.
He also made me a card on his own that said "Hape MOV TRS Da" He just knew there was a T in there.
Dancing Cubbie made a sweet card and project at school. She said "You are the best mom. you are good at making things."
We had the annual breakfast in bed tradition and then up and at 'em I had to teach Sunday School. After church we went to lunch at an Italian resturant, the one with the trees on the roof. Short timers, the name is escaping me tonight. Then, bless the mother who threw a birthday party for her son from 1-4 and invited both of our children. They had a great time and I indulged in a nap. What a great mother's day!
How tall is your Mom? 165 feet tall. Pretty tall about 3 times taller than his Dad who measured in at 55 feet tall.
What does your mom tell you all the time? "Feed the Dog"....I was hoping for "I love you"
When your mom shops what does she like to buy? "Food" Evident we only grocery shop together.
Your Mom's favorite movie and music? Kung fu Panda and Who let the dogs out.
What is your Dad's favorite song? He doesn't sing.
What do you like to do most with your mom? Watch TV (I never knew this)
What do your parents like to cook? Mom-Cheese pizza, Dad-peas
What is your Dad's favorite dessert? Warm ice Cream
What is your Dad's favorite Drink? Milk
Dancing cubbie said, "I think he got confused about Dad and answered his own favorites>" I do say I agree with her.
He also made me a card on his own that said "Hape MOV TRS Da" He just knew there was a T in there.
Dancing Cubbie made a sweet card and project at school. She said "You are the best mom. you are good at making things."
We had the annual breakfast in bed tradition and then up and at 'em I had to teach Sunday School. After church we went to lunch at an Italian resturant, the one with the trees on the roof. Short timers, the name is escaping me tonight. Then, bless the mother who threw a birthday party for her son from 1-4 and invited both of our children. They had a great time and I indulged in a nap. What a great mother's day!
Someone else says and I love it!
Mother Teresa said, "If we judge people we have no time to love them."
It is hot, hot, hot. After school today, we put on our swim suits and sprayed each other with the hose. It was refreshing. Cubbie bear thought it would be good to wear sweats to soccer. He doesn't do cold well. He was drenched in sweat after his sister's practice. Both cubbies are playing soccer. They are really good at it. I was directing Dancing Cubbie to pass the ball, let her teammates have a chance with the ball. Her assistant coach came up to me after practice and said, "She gets better with every practice. She is a natural. Let her take it to the goal, we need the points." Here I am trying to teach teamwork.....she is naturally good at so many things. She could dominate, but in the long run she'll wear out if she doesn't learn how to give others opportunities, even if it is the least of players. It is challenging to teach teamwork in a world so wanting to win. Maybe if we get some points and if she goes others will have their fires burn within them and be pushed a bit. Right now, I am just a parent on the sidelines. I am not the coach or the assistant so I will let them coach and I will continue to cheer for everyone. I'll let you know what happens.
It is hot, hot, hot. After school today, we put on our swim suits and sprayed each other with the hose. It was refreshing. Cubbie bear thought it would be good to wear sweats to soccer. He doesn't do cold well. He was drenched in sweat after his sister's practice. Both cubbies are playing soccer. They are really good at it. I was directing Dancing Cubbie to pass the ball, let her teammates have a chance with the ball. Her assistant coach came up to me after practice and said, "She gets better with every practice. She is a natural. Let her take it to the goal, we need the points." Here I am trying to teach teamwork.....she is naturally good at so many things. She could dominate, but in the long run she'll wear out if she doesn't learn how to give others opportunities, even if it is the least of players. It is challenging to teach teamwork in a world so wanting to win. Maybe if we get some points and if she goes others will have their fires burn within them and be pushed a bit. Right now, I am just a parent on the sidelines. I am not the coach or the assistant so I will let them coach and I will continue to cheer for everyone. I'll let you know what happens.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Peace and Joy
I found this in my handwritten journal and it spoke to me once again today. This is the peace of Christ that reminded me that I so need to be right where I am. So I will share it here as I enjoy reading it again and again.
There is more honesty in being a fellow pilgrim on a journey not knowing than being one who thinks they know everything, yet is evidenced by all their telling they really don't know.
Truth, truth they cry out but really they don't want truth. They think they have the market on truth. Such is telling God what your plan is and asking him to bless it rather than just proceeding on this pilgrimage.
You O' Lord knew me before my days began being numbered on this earth. You O'Lord dwell in the secret place. You O' Lord are full of blessing, goodness, mercy and unfailing love. You O' Lord suprise and amaze me again and again with your touch, your abundant mercy and grace, your sense of humor. To you O'Lord belong all things which you dispense willingly to those who look to you. Thank you!!!
One last thought for today: Somewhere between being somebody and nobody we are called to be his body.
There is more honesty in being a fellow pilgrim on a journey not knowing than being one who thinks they know everything, yet is evidenced by all their telling they really don't know.
Truth, truth they cry out but really they don't want truth. They think they have the market on truth. Such is telling God what your plan is and asking him to bless it rather than just proceeding on this pilgrimage.
You O' Lord knew me before my days began being numbered on this earth. You O'Lord dwell in the secret place. You O' Lord are full of blessing, goodness, mercy and unfailing love. You O' Lord suprise and amaze me again and again with your touch, your abundant mercy and grace, your sense of humor. To you O'Lord belong all things which you dispense willingly to those who look to you. Thank you!!!
One last thought for today: Somewhere between being somebody and nobody we are called to be his body.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Humbled by the King!
Ok, so a week after practically congratulating myself for being open to and respectful to other's faith another AMAZING THING HAPPENED. The Lord put me in my place! Last week at Dancing cubbies school there was a concert she sang in, as did the majority of her class. There is a little girl in her class whom I will call the Scientist, (I think she'd like it and it is a future blessing for her)
The Scientist used to be very apprehensive toward me in kindergarten but over time she has become a cheerleader with smiles and joy filled greetings to me. Earlier in the year, I had the privilege to meet her parents. The Little Scientist's Mom held me at arms length. After the concert, I waved to the Scientist's mom getting that apprehensive reaction I used to get from the Scientist.
My ah ha moment, I realized that I have failed on all fronts to be loving and open to others. When Dancing cubbie started Kindergarten she wanted to understand where she belonged. Most of her friends were Muslim, so she came home and said she was going to convert to be like her friends. We had a long discussion about things. But I realize in a moment of terror, before I calmed down and thought things through that I stupidly, shared the 9-11 story and said the Muslim's did that to our country. Even if it was an extremist group it wasn't right for me to put all Muslim's in that group (of people wanting to hurt Americans).
So, this week Jesus took me to the tomb of that reality-that part of me that was walking in darkness, my judgement to the Scientist and her family.
As the two women walked to the tomb, they looked in (I sat with that for a while and it hasn't felt good) and immediately ran from there fearful and excited(I walked away mentally from overthinking it). Along the way they met Jesus.(I am so grateful he forgives me and that he showed me the truth) (the bible story is found in all four Gospels) When we look in the tomb, we must run from there and along the way Jesus will meet us. It is the running away from the tomb that demonstrates our faith.
I am sure that as Cubbie came home and shared so much of what she learned socially with me. The scientist went home telling her mom what she learned at school as well. Nice job jingly! Not a shinning moment. Anyway, this I know about the Scientist's mom, though she may never choose to have a trusting relationship with me, she has been gracious and kind to my daughter, never once encouraging her to be anything than she already is a Christian.
The Scientist used to be very apprehensive toward me in kindergarten but over time she has become a cheerleader with smiles and joy filled greetings to me. Earlier in the year, I had the privilege to meet her parents. The Little Scientist's Mom held me at arms length. After the concert, I waved to the Scientist's mom getting that apprehensive reaction I used to get from the Scientist.
My ah ha moment, I realized that I have failed on all fronts to be loving and open to others. When Dancing cubbie started Kindergarten she wanted to understand where she belonged. Most of her friends were Muslim, so she came home and said she was going to convert to be like her friends. We had a long discussion about things. But I realize in a moment of terror, before I calmed down and thought things through that I stupidly, shared the 9-11 story and said the Muslim's did that to our country. Even if it was an extremist group it wasn't right for me to put all Muslim's in that group (of people wanting to hurt Americans).
So, this week Jesus took me to the tomb of that reality-that part of me that was walking in darkness, my judgement to the Scientist and her family.
As the two women walked to the tomb, they looked in (I sat with that for a while and it hasn't felt good) and immediately ran from there fearful and excited(I walked away mentally from overthinking it). Along the way they met Jesus.(I am so grateful he forgives me and that he showed me the truth) (the bible story is found in all four Gospels) When we look in the tomb, we must run from there and along the way Jesus will meet us. It is the running away from the tomb that demonstrates our faith.
I am sure that as Cubbie came home and shared so much of what she learned socially with me. The scientist went home telling her mom what she learned at school as well. Nice job jingly! Not a shinning moment. Anyway, this I know about the Scientist's mom, though she may never choose to have a trusting relationship with me, she has been gracious and kind to my daughter, never once encouraging her to be anything than she already is a Christian.
Monday, April 18, 2011
This hot head says, "Always best to wait upon the Lord"
A word regarding my last blog.....I found the courage to address the woman from the bus stop whom by the way I adore. Yes, I have bi-polar emotions often. I adored her before last week's incident. Anyway, she was very apologetic and genuinely felt horrible-she had tears and may have wept if I didn't offer a healthy dose of Christ's grace. Last week Friday, I'd been going over this all day in my head how to address this issue. Near the end of the day, I realized that I was trying to control things. I didn't end up going to the bus stop that day because cubbie was a car rider. So, I confessed and asked God to provide what was needed in this situation because he knew her heart and the way to his will much better than me. I also prayed before I left for the bus stop today.
This is what I learned that in her country of origin which she has only been here a number of years, it is rare that orphans are adopted. If you do adopt you are not allowed to give the child your last name. Orphans don't get a birth certificate so they can't get a job and they are left to remain true orphans throughout their lives. Kinda like the caste society in India, you're stuck at the bottom. So, our unity agreed that this culture would change by the power of our Great God!
This is a true test of sisters standing together who don't see eye to eye on some things. She is Muslim and I am Christian. If you are the least bit worried about me I encourage you to check out the book Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albolum as a Jewish man and a Christian Pastor work together to transform a community by respecting each other's differences. We can do this too. God did not give us a Spirit of Fear but of power, love and a sound mind. If I hope to be forgiven for my bi-polar emotions (the anger that has been so passionate) and for my judgement regarding a culture and religion that is very different than mine. I must learn to walk as Jesus.
He did point out others sin's to them as he needed to do so but he abides with people much more. He was respectful of the priests in the church for years before he ever said hey, look I've had enough of this wrong teaching. In three days..... He did get testy with the money changers quickly, but the zealots, the priests, his followers, think of Judas, he let them be who they were and loved them all the same without speaking to the issues until the appointed time. He didn't condemn Judas he just said I know what you are going to do, do it. He knows all our sins, but he doesn't ask us to throw people's differences or sins in their faces to get them to face them. He doesn't need us for that. He is capable of taking us to the tomb and asking us to look. What he asks us to do is to look in, and run from there. In that obedience he will meet us on the road and help us along the way.
Now another thing to consider, I just learned this the other day and I have yet to read the Koran to test it. So, I am trusting that Suzanne's study has been thorough and was given to me at the appointed time. Mohamed went to the caves and a spirit came to him and called himself Gabriel. He was tortured by this Spirit. He went to his wife. She said go see my relative, whom by the way was a Christian. The Christian was so thrilled that it was Gabriel that he didn't test the spirit, as the bible teaches and it must not have registered that Mohamed was tortured. He instructed Mohamed to go tell his people what the Spirit said and this has become a stone in the religion of Islam.
Now this I know Christ calls me to love not judge. He also calls whom he chooses to be his. It is not my choice, call or judgement. IF the Muslims were mislead and a Christian was supposed to have been the one to protect their faith by instructing Mohamed not to share what that spirit said. I think it would be that same spirit trying to separate us through judgement. Also the great God I serve promised even the stones would cry out if his people who are called by his name would pray, if were judging we are a stone, if we are a praying we are his people called by his name.
Also, if we have Muslims brothers and sisters, God calls us to love isn't it better to listen and know them than to ostracize them? I think what happened today at the bus stop has me answering beyond a shadow of a doubt Yes!
This is what I learned that in her country of origin which she has only been here a number of years, it is rare that orphans are adopted. If you do adopt you are not allowed to give the child your last name. Orphans don't get a birth certificate so they can't get a job and they are left to remain true orphans throughout their lives. Kinda like the caste society in India, you're stuck at the bottom. So, our unity agreed that this culture would change by the power of our Great God!
This is a true test of sisters standing together who don't see eye to eye on some things. She is Muslim and I am Christian. If you are the least bit worried about me I encourage you to check out the book Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albolum as a Jewish man and a Christian Pastor work together to transform a community by respecting each other's differences. We can do this too. God did not give us a Spirit of Fear but of power, love and a sound mind. If I hope to be forgiven for my bi-polar emotions (the anger that has been so passionate) and for my judgement regarding a culture and religion that is very different than mine. I must learn to walk as Jesus.
He did point out others sin's to them as he needed to do so but he abides with people much more. He was respectful of the priests in the church for years before he ever said hey, look I've had enough of this wrong teaching. In three days..... He did get testy with the money changers quickly, but the zealots, the priests, his followers, think of Judas, he let them be who they were and loved them all the same without speaking to the issues until the appointed time. He didn't condemn Judas he just said I know what you are going to do, do it. He knows all our sins, but he doesn't ask us to throw people's differences or sins in their faces to get them to face them. He doesn't need us for that. He is capable of taking us to the tomb and asking us to look. What he asks us to do is to look in, and run from there. In that obedience he will meet us on the road and help us along the way.
Now another thing to consider, I just learned this the other day and I have yet to read the Koran to test it. So, I am trusting that Suzanne's study has been thorough and was given to me at the appointed time. Mohamed went to the caves and a spirit came to him and called himself Gabriel. He was tortured by this Spirit. He went to his wife. She said go see my relative, whom by the way was a Christian. The Christian was so thrilled that it was Gabriel that he didn't test the spirit, as the bible teaches and it must not have registered that Mohamed was tortured. He instructed Mohamed to go tell his people what the Spirit said and this has become a stone in the religion of Islam.
Now this I know Christ calls me to love not judge. He also calls whom he chooses to be his. It is not my choice, call or judgement. IF the Muslims were mislead and a Christian was supposed to have been the one to protect their faith by instructing Mohamed not to share what that spirit said. I think it would be that same spirit trying to separate us through judgement. Also the great God I serve promised even the stones would cry out if his people who are called by his name would pray, if were judging we are a stone, if we are a praying we are his people called by his name.
Also, if we have Muslims brothers and sisters, God calls us to love isn't it better to listen and know them than to ostracize them? I think what happened today at the bus stop has me answering beyond a shadow of a doubt Yes!
King of the Nations
Fear tells us to ostracise not love! So, I have known at least 2 Muslim women who have been so very gracious to me. I have never felt pressure to convert to their religion or do things the way they do. I am unwilling to force my beliefs on these dear ladies however, if I am ever asked the reason for my hope. My answer will be Jesus. I have been honored by their appreciation of the gift of hospitality God has granted me to be used for His service. Each woman has baked for my family. One entered my church to deliver the food. Both have been witnesses of our adoptions and find our choice to adopt across cultures to be honorable. I think God is speaking louder through my family than any words I could say. The 2nd woman I know was from years ago, all I know is that she would be one of the first in line to give Christ a drink or something to wear when he was naked. In doing this at the right moment she acknowledged Christ. Maybe she didn't go in front of the church and confess before everyone but her action was in a society where people saw what she did, just like the woman who broke the alabaster jar and Jesus told his followers to chill, she knew what was right. Is our God that big? King of the Nations, so an action done in the city streets, a restaurant or the library has a crowd of witnesses much like a church. Where did we get this idea you are only saved if you go to church, go to the front etc... Jesus wasn't in the synagogue for long during his ministry. He was in the streets and throughout the countryside. Let's keep Jesus out of the box and trust that he truly has the whole world in his hands.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
One simple act
Remember when Jesus feed the 5,000+. I say plus because history reports there were most likely as many women and children following Jesus as men. A little boy had a few fish and some loaves. Jesus took it and multiplied it. The real gift was the boys willingness to offer his lunch. Like the little boy, we need not be ashamed of bringing our small lunch to Jesus. When people think of generosity most often they think of grand gestures and sweeping acts of charity. But when Jesus gave us an example, he focused on just one simple act. If we are willing to hold our resources with an open hand there is no telling how far Jesus can multiply what we offer.
Now here is the thing I read a story about Betty who gave a clerk $ to pay for another woman's groceries after the other woman had left to go to the bank. The clerk explained that most people don't come back because they are ashamed. Betty insisted on paying. The clerk asked why? Betty explained that she had been in the other woman's position one time wondering how she was going to pay for groceries for 7 on a budget of $109. And she gave now because she was grateful for all God had given her. The clerk rang the groceries and said, "I want to know more about God" That is when it hit Betty that nudge to express this act of generosity wasn't for the woman who went to the bank but for the clerk.
The small simple acts I am challenged to do daily such as forgiving or being kind when I'd rather pummel others for their ignorance or arrogance. For instance like today, I am at the bus stop with my son, who is adopted. One of the mother's says regarding a discussion that came up about adopted children, " Well they weren't wanted by their own family." So, I explain to the woman there are many reasons children are surrendered. Really do we really not get it?? Mess with my kids and I want to rip yer head off and stuff it down your neck and I know it's not Christian like but it is honest mommy! This nut didn't fall far from the tree, yes that is my Dad's voice and you know what I like it! At least, he is honest, albeit not always correct(none of us is) but not pretencious. Love ya Dad!
Adoption is a fact of life. Children are born out of wedlock and surrendered, they are born into poverty, they are born to parents who died during or before childbirth, they are born into homes where for one reason or another(mental illness, chronic illness, illness which will result in death) They have been born girl's when a boy was wanted. They have been the result of rape. They are being born into homes where birth control failed and Dad has been out of work for years and barely is able to feed the mouths around the table or to the mother who experiences post par tum(who in my opinion is very wise to consider adoption, if she doesn't have family support) or the drug addicted or the woman being trafficked or abused and she hopes for a better life for the child she gave birth to. Come on America and it's immigrants wake up! Just because we don't understand something doesn't give us the right to reject those involved in and with adoption stories.
So, here is what I think: Jesus set the example. One small act -be open, hold loosely all that's been given by God to us, and watch what he'll do. For me, I know part of my mission is to be open to women who are oppressed. Oppression takes many forms poverty, abuse, drugs, prostitution, believing lies about oneself, ignorance. Bottom line is I may want to rip someone a new one, but God has commanded me to love and forgive....I don't always want to do what he wants. I have been known to wrestle with God. It's no contest, he is bigger, he is more gracious and more everything than I will ever begin to understand. But this I know he sent us here to love NOT JUDGE! So, I withdraw from wanting to stuff this fine lady's head down her neck and step back and watch what God will do next with this small loaf.
Now here is the thing I read a story about Betty who gave a clerk $ to pay for another woman's groceries after the other woman had left to go to the bank. The clerk explained that most people don't come back because they are ashamed. Betty insisted on paying. The clerk asked why? Betty explained that she had been in the other woman's position one time wondering how she was going to pay for groceries for 7 on a budget of $109. And she gave now because she was grateful for all God had given her. The clerk rang the groceries and said, "I want to know more about God" That is when it hit Betty that nudge to express this act of generosity wasn't for the woman who went to the bank but for the clerk.
The small simple acts I am challenged to do daily such as forgiving or being kind when I'd rather pummel others for their ignorance or arrogance. For instance like today, I am at the bus stop with my son, who is adopted. One of the mother's says regarding a discussion that came up about adopted children, " Well they weren't wanted by their own family." So, I explain to the woman there are many reasons children are surrendered. Really do we really not get it?? Mess with my kids and I want to rip yer head off and stuff it down your neck and I know it's not Christian like but it is honest mommy! This nut didn't fall far from the tree, yes that is my Dad's voice and you know what I like it! At least, he is honest, albeit not always correct(none of us is) but not pretencious. Love ya Dad!
Adoption is a fact of life. Children are born out of wedlock and surrendered, they are born into poverty, they are born to parents who died during or before childbirth, they are born into homes where for one reason or another(mental illness, chronic illness, illness which will result in death) They have been born girl's when a boy was wanted. They have been the result of rape. They are being born into homes where birth control failed and Dad has been out of work for years and barely is able to feed the mouths around the table or to the mother who experiences post par tum(who in my opinion is very wise to consider adoption, if she doesn't have family support) or the drug addicted or the woman being trafficked or abused and she hopes for a better life for the child she gave birth to. Come on America and it's immigrants wake up! Just because we don't understand something doesn't give us the right to reject those involved in and with adoption stories.
So, here is what I think: Jesus set the example. One small act -be open, hold loosely all that's been given by God to us, and watch what he'll do. For me, I know part of my mission is to be open to women who are oppressed. Oppression takes many forms poverty, abuse, drugs, prostitution, believing lies about oneself, ignorance. Bottom line is I may want to rip someone a new one, but God has commanded me to love and forgive....I don't always want to do what he wants. I have been known to wrestle with God. It's no contest, he is bigger, he is more gracious and more everything than I will ever begin to understand. But this I know he sent us here to love NOT JUDGE! So, I withdraw from wanting to stuff this fine lady's head down her neck and step back and watch what God will do next with this small loaf.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Good News!
Don't bring out the party hats yet but lets rejoice in knowing the judge has ruled that K can stay in Ohio! We can party when the fat lady sings so to speak. We have to wait for the dotted line to be signed, the i's dotted and t's crossed. Thank you Lord for blessing this family for their devotion to you and their willingness to put it all on the line for what is right for the orphans! Win, lose or draw...you my friend Cheri have taught me a valuable lesson about going all the way for the cause. I appreciate you, your ministry, and your devotion. I know you think it is I helping you but you are truly the one who showed me what Jesus would do through your actions and in your moments of weakness. In Jesus weakness he held on, and he asked others to pray and so did you. I thank you for allowing me to be part of the journey. I am pleased to call you friend.
Confessions from a grateful heart
In everything give thanks
Many of you know my all time favorite Christian role model is Corrie Ten Boom. Her sister Bestie read this in Thessalonians while they were incarcerated in a flea infested shack that was filled with 1,400 women but was only supposed to fit 400. Betsie encouraged Corrie to thank God for everything including the fleas. Well, Corrie thought Betsie a bit deft at that prayer and plea. But turns out the reason the girls bible was never confiscated, or they were never brutally punished for their bible, and that they were able to eventually have bible study with many women in the hell hole was because the guards refused to enter the shack due to the fleas.
So, now for my confession: Yesterday, I called Sara to say, "We only have this Wednesday available to bowl if we are going to pre-bowl." So, off Sara goes to call and make arrangements. A couple hours later Dancing cubbie comes home with a note that her art work was a teacher's choice to be shown at the school art/craft show. (Which by the way she had signed up to be part of by creating independent projects at home. This happened with lots of drama but that is another story. One that I had gone out of my way to provide her the opportunity.) Anyway, the date of the art show which I'd failed to put on the calendar was Wednesday. Ugh!
So, here is where I failed to appreciate the grace of God in the moment. He reminded me about an important event. Instead of recognizing it my brain went into hyper drive about being irresponsible, inconveniencing others, not having the tools to be able to do these things.
Today, I have said thank you Lord for when I am weak you are strong. Thank you for friends that don't put unrealistic expectations on me and that weren't the least bit bothered by the fact we couldn't make it to pre-bowl. Thank you for a husband who was willing to call our teammates and accept me for better or worse. One who doesn't judge me when I make mistakes but really knows how to come along side me and make me stronger! Thank you for reminding me yesterday, today and one day last week about things I needed to attend to. God really does go before us, walk with us and have our backs. Even when we don't see it we just need to keep thanking him. Even for the fleas in life.
Many of you know my all time favorite Christian role model is Corrie Ten Boom. Her sister Bestie read this in Thessalonians while they were incarcerated in a flea infested shack that was filled with 1,400 women but was only supposed to fit 400. Betsie encouraged Corrie to thank God for everything including the fleas. Well, Corrie thought Betsie a bit deft at that prayer and plea. But turns out the reason the girls bible was never confiscated, or they were never brutally punished for their bible, and that they were able to eventually have bible study with many women in the hell hole was because the guards refused to enter the shack due to the fleas.
So, now for my confession: Yesterday, I called Sara to say, "We only have this Wednesday available to bowl if we are going to pre-bowl." So, off Sara goes to call and make arrangements. A couple hours later Dancing cubbie comes home with a note that her art work was a teacher's choice to be shown at the school art/craft show. (Which by the way she had signed up to be part of by creating independent projects at home. This happened with lots of drama but that is another story. One that I had gone out of my way to provide her the opportunity.) Anyway, the date of the art show which I'd failed to put on the calendar was Wednesday. Ugh!
So, here is where I failed to appreciate the grace of God in the moment. He reminded me about an important event. Instead of recognizing it my brain went into hyper drive about being irresponsible, inconveniencing others, not having the tools to be able to do these things.
Today, I have said thank you Lord for when I am weak you are strong. Thank you for friends that don't put unrealistic expectations on me and that weren't the least bit bothered by the fact we couldn't make it to pre-bowl. Thank you for a husband who was willing to call our teammates and accept me for better or worse. One who doesn't judge me when I make mistakes but really knows how to come along side me and make me stronger! Thank you for reminding me yesterday, today and one day last week about things I needed to attend to. God really does go before us, walk with us and have our backs. Even when we don't see it we just need to keep thanking him. Even for the fleas in life.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Ramblings of mother/wife
Today, I registered our youngest cubbie bear for kindergarten. How time flies. Everyone says the youngest is the hardest but that was not my experience. I had a harder time with the unknown of things when registering our eldest for school. Today, was old hat or at least familiar ground. Most assuredly it helped to see my friend Nancy behind the registration table. I think it will be more challenging taking him to school for testing and then for the first day. This past year he was so ready and excited for pre-school. Now, he just wants to stay home with me all day.
Beyond registration, I am cleaning up the remnants from our eldest's 7th birthday party. Then, on to planning to meet with the Master thespian to practice the puppet show we will performing for the children's Easter program.
Our family loves to have time together alone. We also love getting together with friends and taking part in our day to day responsibilities (work,volunteering and school) but time together just the 4 (or 6 counting the pets) is something we all desire. My goal has been to keep a day of rest and a mid-week evening open just for family. It is such a challenge to keep this tradition solid. So, often this or that comes up and requires we fudge just a little and I think most families find this to be a similar story in their own lives. My husband is really good about wanting/needing this family time and after all these years together I finally get it. I feel it.... the stretch on us as a unit when we don't get that time together. This past week was one of those weeks. No day of rest and no mid-week time just us. Everything seems so rushed and crammed in and one of my sponsors from the Emmaus walk just asked how I was doing in this area.
A couple new factors to consider, Papa Bear has a new position which has him working a little longer each day. This time away has taken a toll on our family. So, we must adjust. Overall, I thought we'd done pretty good balancing our week. I still think we did pretty good but what do you do about going out to play and ending up with neighbors playing with you in the yard? We don't want to be rude. I wish we lived in the country! Our yard is an extension of our home, yet the neighbors have more access to us. An impromptu play date is nothing for those young 20 something parents, who can still burn the candle at both ends, but for we mid-40ers one little play date can be the difference between staying connected and being stretched too thin. I want to be social and neighborly but I don't want to lose my family only time.
Beyond registration, I am cleaning up the remnants from our eldest's 7th birthday party. Then, on to planning to meet with the Master thespian to practice the puppet show we will performing for the children's Easter program.
Our family loves to have time together alone. We also love getting together with friends and taking part in our day to day responsibilities (work,volunteering and school) but time together just the 4 (or 6 counting the pets) is something we all desire. My goal has been to keep a day of rest and a mid-week evening open just for family. It is such a challenge to keep this tradition solid. So, often this or that comes up and requires we fudge just a little and I think most families find this to be a similar story in their own lives. My husband is really good about wanting/needing this family time and after all these years together I finally get it. I feel it.... the stretch on us as a unit when we don't get that time together. This past week was one of those weeks. No day of rest and no mid-week time just us. Everything seems so rushed and crammed in and one of my sponsors from the Emmaus walk just asked how I was doing in this area.
A couple new factors to consider, Papa Bear has a new position which has him working a little longer each day. This time away has taken a toll on our family. So, we must adjust. Overall, I thought we'd done pretty good balancing our week. I still think we did pretty good but what do you do about going out to play and ending up with neighbors playing with you in the yard? We don't want to be rude. I wish we lived in the country! Our yard is an extension of our home, yet the neighbors have more access to us. An impromptu play date is nothing for those young 20 something parents, who can still burn the candle at both ends, but for we mid-40ers one little play date can be the difference between staying connected and being stretched too thin. I want to be social and neighborly but I don't want to lose my family only time.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Awesome Faithfulness
It has been a while since I've had time to sit at the computer to write. I have so many things to say today and so little time before picking up cubbie from school. Let me start with how good and faithful God is everyday! The Lord has meet me at a few critical points of need this week. My first was when I asked him to step in because it seemed I'd stepped in something without realizing it. I had attended a meeting that ran long and I missed the cue to lead and leave. I hope the other ladies weren't feeling as exhausted as I on Tuesday morning.
Tuesday was a big shopping day to prepare for dancing cubbies birthday celebration. One of the items I needed for the party were "green bags". You know the kind you can purchase and reuse again and again. Well, our pared down list has 16 children coming to the party. So, I didn't want to do plastic, by now you must know I am a "granola", "tree hugging, burkenstock wearing, organic gardening girl." as my hubby so lovingly pointed out early in our relationship. In our early years, it used to bug me because all the other granolas we knew were marajuana smoking too and that I was not. Not that I am a purist, for in my youth I succumbed to temptation, but "it was not for me," as all or one of the Bear family members say often, usually the cubbies when regarding the vegetables on their plates because they are green. Is it too much to hope they will feel the same way about marajuana one day cause it's green? I digress big time. Anyway, at the one store I found the bags for $ .85 but I was not led to purchase them. I just wasn't feeling it.
On the way out of the parking lot I was praying that God would allow me to find the bags at 2 for $1.00. I turned the wrong direction out of the parking lot and thought why did I do this. I decided since I was headed this direction to add one more stop to our journey. We went by the dollar general. Where I picked up toilet paper that was right by the entry, that I would have forgotten otherwise and it's a good thing to remember what the hubby asks you to do when it isn't that often he asks for assistance. Thank the Lord again. We took a quick puruse around the store and I was like "is that all I was here for Lord?" I checked out and went to back out the door and hold it for Gabe when there by the entry on the other side were the bags I wanted for 2 for $1.00.
The clerk thought I was weird and wacky for cleaning her out of bags and this led to me telling her about God's faithfulness. He sets the stage, all we have to do is show up and thank him for the lines he will give us. AWESOME! I will have to wait to share the stove/oven story for next time as it is time to publish and get cubbie from school. In all our ways acknowledge him and he will make our paths straight!
Tuesday was a big shopping day to prepare for dancing cubbies birthday celebration. One of the items I needed for the party were "green bags". You know the kind you can purchase and reuse again and again. Well, our pared down list has 16 children coming to the party. So, I didn't want to do plastic, by now you must know I am a "granola", "tree hugging, burkenstock wearing, organic gardening girl." as my hubby so lovingly pointed out early in our relationship. In our early years, it used to bug me because all the other granolas we knew were marajuana smoking too and that I was not. Not that I am a purist, for in my youth I succumbed to temptation, but "it was not for me," as all or one of the Bear family members say often, usually the cubbies when regarding the vegetables on their plates because they are green. Is it too much to hope they will feel the same way about marajuana one day cause it's green? I digress big time. Anyway, at the one store I found the bags for $ .85 but I was not led to purchase them. I just wasn't feeling it.
On the way out of the parking lot I was praying that God would allow me to find the bags at 2 for $1.00. I turned the wrong direction out of the parking lot and thought why did I do this. I decided since I was headed this direction to add one more stop to our journey. We went by the dollar general. Where I picked up toilet paper that was right by the entry, that I would have forgotten otherwise and it's a good thing to remember what the hubby asks you to do when it isn't that often he asks for assistance. Thank the Lord again. We took a quick puruse around the store and I was like "is that all I was here for Lord?" I checked out and went to back out the door and hold it for Gabe when there by the entry on the other side were the bags I wanted for 2 for $1.00.
The clerk thought I was weird and wacky for cleaning her out of bags and this led to me telling her about God's faithfulness. He sets the stage, all we have to do is show up and thank him for the lines he will give us. AWESOME! I will have to wait to share the stove/oven story for next time as it is time to publish and get cubbie from school. In all our ways acknowledge him and he will make our paths straight!
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Recycling
I've been taking this composting class and most of what I learned I already knew. But, I found out that the soil here is more alkaline than I am used to working. So, now I am able to move forward and learn how to use this to my plants growing advantage.
Now, I am not one who is lucky on give a ways, but last night I won a vermiculture bin. I was so excited. Woo hoo! Recycling was a huge topic in last night's class. The waste management facility sent over a representative. Did you know that waste management has only been in existence since 1957 in our area? I learned some things about my State that I didn't know and some things I know that make me sad and unhappy, partly because we have become so dependant on plastic and justify it's use even though the poisons emanated to break it down are no good for us and it can never be completely recycled. So why, do we use it? It saves us $$. I'd like to commit to getting rid of plastic but then how would I do these blogs or drink milk for that matter. Anyway, I am starting this year with riding my home of things made from other countries. Unless I purchased them from there on a visit or someone else purchased them from there on a visit. Did you know that if each American purchased just $68- worth of American made products a year 200,000 jobs would be created here in the USA.
Now, don't get me wrong I want other countries to prosper as well. I just don't want my country to lose it's value(s) because it sources out it's work. WE cannot be everything to everyone. Doesn't America become a prostitute by trying to become everything to everyone? Her value definitely is diminished and her fortresses are weakened. As the world has more and more conflict, we send our troops (I am pro-military) to cover problems as we let more non-Christians into our country some who would like to see America extinguished. So, if our strength is sourced out, our fortresses weakened and the enemy within our territory rises up against us we only have the good Lord to depend upon. Sometimes, pulling back is necessary to protect that which our forefathers worked so hard to provide for us.
It is like the sign I read this week that said Education is earned not given. OF course that sign used other language but to simplify it. We can test and test, even teach to the test and students will still fail if they aren't willing to earn the education because if it is worth having it is worth working toward but you cannot change the apathy of another. And God have mercy on the one who thinks they know all the mysteries of Christ or that their brand of Jesus is better than how others see Jesus and are above being taught. You can lead horses to water but you cannot force them to drink. Yes, prayer changes things I highly encourage and participate in it. But, bottom line is if we aren't willing to allow the the good news to work in our lives first, we remain a resounding gong. Sometimes the Lord will show us something in another's life that bugs us so much we think we need to fix it but our job isn't to change the other person it is to look at our own life and see where we can make that 2 degree change and more often than not what bugged us in the other person will remain no longer because what God was trying to teach us was resolved when we took care of it in our own life. When we have successfully done that then we have the platform of weakness through which Christ's strength can be glorified. When we are weak he is strong, but he also says wisdom is to be highly prized. Wisdom is that education that can only be learned through the journey.
Which leads me to my favorite question that my accountability partners, close friends and I have begun to discuss, "How this week was your faith tested through failure?" You see I know I am a failure, without Christ I have nothing. The best news I received this morning is that even our mistakes and sins can be recycled into something good through MY Lord's transforming power. One more reason to love and not judge!
Now, I am not one who is lucky on give a ways, but last night I won a vermiculture bin. I was so excited. Woo hoo! Recycling was a huge topic in last night's class. The waste management facility sent over a representative. Did you know that waste management has only been in existence since 1957 in our area? I learned some things about my State that I didn't know and some things I know that make me sad and unhappy, partly because we have become so dependant on plastic and justify it's use even though the poisons emanated to break it down are no good for us and it can never be completely recycled. So why, do we use it? It saves us $$. I'd like to commit to getting rid of plastic but then how would I do these blogs or drink milk for that matter. Anyway, I am starting this year with riding my home of things made from other countries. Unless I purchased them from there on a visit or someone else purchased them from there on a visit. Did you know that if each American purchased just $68- worth of American made products a year 200,000 jobs would be created here in the USA.
Now, don't get me wrong I want other countries to prosper as well. I just don't want my country to lose it's value(s) because it sources out it's work. WE cannot be everything to everyone. Doesn't America become a prostitute by trying to become everything to everyone? Her value definitely is diminished and her fortresses are weakened. As the world has more and more conflict, we send our troops (I am pro-military) to cover problems as we let more non-Christians into our country some who would like to see America extinguished. So, if our strength is sourced out, our fortresses weakened and the enemy within our territory rises up against us we only have the good Lord to depend upon. Sometimes, pulling back is necessary to protect that which our forefathers worked so hard to provide for us.
It is like the sign I read this week that said Education is earned not given. OF course that sign used other language but to simplify it. We can test and test, even teach to the test and students will still fail if they aren't willing to earn the education because if it is worth having it is worth working toward but you cannot change the apathy of another. And God have mercy on the one who thinks they know all the mysteries of Christ or that their brand of Jesus is better than how others see Jesus and are above being taught. You can lead horses to water but you cannot force them to drink. Yes, prayer changes things I highly encourage and participate in it. But, bottom line is if we aren't willing to allow the the good news to work in our lives first, we remain a resounding gong. Sometimes the Lord will show us something in another's life that bugs us so much we think we need to fix it but our job isn't to change the other person it is to look at our own life and see where we can make that 2 degree change and more often than not what bugged us in the other person will remain no longer because what God was trying to teach us was resolved when we took care of it in our own life. When we have successfully done that then we have the platform of weakness through which Christ's strength can be glorified. When we are weak he is strong, but he also says wisdom is to be highly prized. Wisdom is that education that can only be learned through the journey.
Which leads me to my favorite question that my accountability partners, close friends and I have begun to discuss, "How this week was your faith tested through failure?" You see I know I am a failure, without Christ I have nothing. The best news I received this morning is that even our mistakes and sins can be recycled into something good through MY Lord's transforming power. One more reason to love and not judge!
Friday, March 18, 2011
Questions for today?
I'd love to hear what you think either on the blog or on my personal email.
When evaluating yourself spiritually, do you rely on being religious or on being loved by God? How does being loved by God manifest itself in your day to day life?
When evaluating yourself spiritually, do you rely on being religious or on being loved by God? How does being loved by God manifest itself in your day to day life?
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
God's will......this morning I have this understanding that God's will requires I break things down and work very slowly with Huggie Bear again. Huggie Bear for those of you who may not know is our 2 year old yellow labrador. I should have known something was brewing as the past few weeks, I've been thinking if only I could find him a home with a 20 something year old who likes to run everyday and loves dogs. Prior to the past few weeks, Huggie and I have been doing very well. In fact, I'd been taking him out without a gentle leader and my mistake was thinking after 6 months of peace that he finally has this 'being a social dog' down. But, once again the beast within him has risen to the top and his anti-social behavior would have had him throttle a new dog in the neighborhood had I not been able to subdue him. He is back to wolfing his food down. My least favorite part of spring, it brings out the beast in my dog.
So, our future looks like Huggie doesn't get to eat unless he has performed. A suggestion from my dog trainer friend, Yvonne. This again a suggestion she made a year and a half ago, that I am only trying in the near future.
I have to provide a higher degree of structure in my own life in order to help our dog. I am confllicted because I can get up and walk him at 4 am but this doesn't give him an opportunity to learn how to be social. Noone else is up walking their dog at 4 am. Later in the morning, he could hurt one of the kids when he gets crazy. And we did this before, it was just too much stress on me with two kids and a crazy dog. If I wait until afternoon, I should be able to take him with the possibility of running across another dog as the spring comes. I could reorganize my schedule so that he gets walked everyday but one at 1pm. I feel bad that he will have to wait to eat. Seriously, if he eats breakfast he will completely ignore me if I ask him to leave the animal across the street alone. Maybe a starving dog will pay better attention. I feel like a drill seargent just thinking about it.
Anyway, if I look too much at the road ahead of Huggie and myself, it feels like a huge, huge burden. What I need to do is keep my eyes on the Lord and remind myself of all the places he's brought us through this far. The Lord will see us through no matter how long it takes this I know. I also know he is faithful, even and especially when I have trouble believing I don't have the strength to make it through this or that part of the journey.
So, our future looks like Huggie doesn't get to eat unless he has performed. A suggestion from my dog trainer friend, Yvonne. This again a suggestion she made a year and a half ago, that I am only trying in the near future.
I have to provide a higher degree of structure in my own life in order to help our dog. I am confllicted because I can get up and walk him at 4 am but this doesn't give him an opportunity to learn how to be social. Noone else is up walking their dog at 4 am. Later in the morning, he could hurt one of the kids when he gets crazy. And we did this before, it was just too much stress on me with two kids and a crazy dog. If I wait until afternoon, I should be able to take him with the possibility of running across another dog as the spring comes. I could reorganize my schedule so that he gets walked everyday but one at 1pm. I feel bad that he will have to wait to eat. Seriously, if he eats breakfast he will completely ignore me if I ask him to leave the animal across the street alone. Maybe a starving dog will pay better attention. I feel like a drill seargent just thinking about it.
Anyway, if I look too much at the road ahead of Huggie and myself, it feels like a huge, huge burden. What I need to do is keep my eyes on the Lord and remind myself of all the places he's brought us through this far. The Lord will see us through no matter how long it takes this I know. I also know he is faithful, even and especially when I have trouble believing I don't have the strength to make it through this or that part of the journey.
Monday, March 14, 2011
The school carnival was fun. Dancing cubbie won a free cake with the neatest Mardigra face decorated on top. We, I say, we because I submitted it in her name but I did the cooking. She won the best tasting chili apron for a student/teacher entry. Pretty cool!
A friend recommended I read Eat, Pray, Love. I just so happened to return some books to the library Saturday and there it was so I picked it up. Has anyone else read it? I would love to hear what you think or thought of it.
So, I am working on this new chapter of my life where I practice being grateful for all things in my life. I generally can come up with many things to be grateful for on a daily basis. But, now I hear the call to be grateful for the challenges in my life as grateful as I am for the good stuff. So, I've been practicing. I must be honest here and say I have issues with this because I don't want to become the pain in the rumpass who says oh this is great when in all reality it stinks. Sometimes, life stinks(as my cousin in Afghan. can attest to next to the poop pond) sometimes it is completely unfair and for that I cannot smile and say oh isn't life grand. But, I think I can be honest and be thankful that those unfair situations will teach me things like how to love that which drives me crazy, how to wait when I feel like forging ahead, how to hold the line when I'd rather run, how to be truly attentive rather than distracted etc. Oh and good news for all of us as my cousin reports that even though she may not like being next to the poop pond she is getting used to it. A rally cry for more tolerance............
Now, stick with me here cause I never said I'd have all the pieces. I come just as I am and there is a lot of space between items but somehow God slowly makes sense of these thoughts in my mind. Today, I write them. In a month, maybe a year all the sudden he puts more light on them and clarifies what he is saying and yes he says to me and to you. I truly try whenever I hear from him to apply all to my life first. Then, I have a foundation to stand on not just my man-made soap box.
In the body of believer's there are rib issues and spine issues. A spine we can't do without. A rib can be broken or taken out and one can still survive. One can't walk without a spine, but one can have a rib removed and still make it a long way. Here is a rib issue between Protestants and Catholics-I by the way love both my Protestant and Catholic relatives and the Lord is working in the lives of each. A Protestant believes the mail should arrive on time. They would ask can you make it to dinner next Thursday? And if you are a good Protestant you'd say why of course Yes. Because a Protestant believes they are captain of their own ship.
Whereas a Catholic is more likely to believe the mail's arrival is based on fate and cannot be guaranteed by man. And as for your invitation to dinner....How can any of us(Catholics) know whether we will be free next Thursday given that everything is in God's hands and none of us can know our fate. If you ask Ireland they think this is worth fighting over. If you ask Jesus though he'd say, "A cry for more tolerance." but it would sound more like "You are to esteem others more highly than you regard yourself." "Love thy neighbor"
Again, it doesn't matter to fret over or use as an excuse, the small stuff is sin when the I am who is Jesus says to "Love your neighbor" Oh and that is a hard pill to swallow because for me it requires going to his feet daily and saying help me Lord help me cause without you I can love nothing and noone! If I am completely truthful sometimes, I don't like your children...the one's you call me to serve! But nonetheless I hear the call and not my will but thine O Lord.
A friend recommended I read Eat, Pray, Love. I just so happened to return some books to the library Saturday and there it was so I picked it up. Has anyone else read it? I would love to hear what you think or thought of it.
So, I am working on this new chapter of my life where I practice being grateful for all things in my life. I generally can come up with many things to be grateful for on a daily basis. But, now I hear the call to be grateful for the challenges in my life as grateful as I am for the good stuff. So, I've been practicing. I must be honest here and say I have issues with this because I don't want to become the pain in the rumpass who says oh this is great when in all reality it stinks. Sometimes, life stinks(as my cousin in Afghan. can attest to next to the poop pond) sometimes it is completely unfair and for that I cannot smile and say oh isn't life grand. But, I think I can be honest and be thankful that those unfair situations will teach me things like how to love that which drives me crazy, how to wait when I feel like forging ahead, how to hold the line when I'd rather run, how to be truly attentive rather than distracted etc. Oh and good news for all of us as my cousin reports that even though she may not like being next to the poop pond she is getting used to it. A rally cry for more tolerance............
Now, stick with me here cause I never said I'd have all the pieces. I come just as I am and there is a lot of space between items but somehow God slowly makes sense of these thoughts in my mind. Today, I write them. In a month, maybe a year all the sudden he puts more light on them and clarifies what he is saying and yes he says to me and to you. I truly try whenever I hear from him to apply all to my life first. Then, I have a foundation to stand on not just my man-made soap box.
In the body of believer's there are rib issues and spine issues. A spine we can't do without. A rib can be broken or taken out and one can still survive. One can't walk without a spine, but one can have a rib removed and still make it a long way. Here is a rib issue between Protestants and Catholics-I by the way love both my Protestant and Catholic relatives and the Lord is working in the lives of each. A Protestant believes the mail should arrive on time. They would ask can you make it to dinner next Thursday? And if you are a good Protestant you'd say why of course Yes. Because a Protestant believes they are captain of their own ship.
Whereas a Catholic is more likely to believe the mail's arrival is based on fate and cannot be guaranteed by man. And as for your invitation to dinner....How can any of us(Catholics) know whether we will be free next Thursday given that everything is in God's hands and none of us can know our fate. If you ask Ireland they think this is worth fighting over. If you ask Jesus though he'd say, "A cry for more tolerance." but it would sound more like "You are to esteem others more highly than you regard yourself." "Love thy neighbor"
Again, it doesn't matter to fret over or use as an excuse, the small stuff is sin when the I am who is Jesus says to "Love your neighbor" Oh and that is a hard pill to swallow because for me it requires going to his feet daily and saying help me Lord help me cause without you I can love nothing and noone! If I am completely truthful sometimes, I don't like your children...the one's you call me to serve! But nonetheless I hear the call and not my will but thine O Lord.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Blessed beyond measure
Most religions have a founder who tries to teach you how to find God. Christianity is the only religion where God is trying to find YOU! PRAISE BE TO GOD! I want my Father's Blessing and that doesn't make me selfish or immature. It means that I want him, it means he has given me agape, love undeserved so that I want to love him back.
Boxes
Years ago when I was substituting, a teacher friend suggested baving a 'bag of tricks." I took the idea and carried a box of supplies with me to have on hand if in case a lesson plan was not prepared or if I needed educational content rather than fluff. I didn't want to just be a babysitting service. I worked too hard to earn the certificate I was determined to use it. A toolbox, educational box, "bag of tricks" is great for making repairs and or teaching.
In our humaness, we like boxes. I have boxes of toys to entertain children, another box of medication for colds and flus, others to store paint, summer and winter clothes. As Christians we have boxes too Baptist, Lutheran, Methodist, Catholic and so on. And even more divisive, unloving, arrogant attitudes rising up from blood bought, grace taught siblings. Instead of criticizing or mocking others we are called to be concerned about one another in order to promote love and good works. Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethern to dwell together in unity. Our first real steps toward unity are not toward those we naturally like. They're toward those we don't. Jesus unity only exists when those who stood sword to sword are now standing shoulder to shoulder.
The damage sin does in our heart cannot be reparied by a toolbox of talents or resources. Jesus is the only one who can provide for this need. If we know Jesus then his Holy Spirit is repairing our hearts. Christ's wisdom, grace and power can be released into every nook and cranny in our lives. We need God every day and in every way. As Believers, we're as dependant on his grace this moment as when we first believed. Each time we come to Jesus we realize how poor we are without him. Blessed are the poor in spirit for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these. To be poor in spirit is to be bankrupt totally dependent upon God at all times for all things. God's power is at work in the lives of those willing to live like this the question is will we live this way?
In our humaness, we like boxes. I have boxes of toys to entertain children, another box of medication for colds and flus, others to store paint, summer and winter clothes. As Christians we have boxes too Baptist, Lutheran, Methodist, Catholic and so on. And even more divisive, unloving, arrogant attitudes rising up from blood bought, grace taught siblings. Instead of criticizing or mocking others we are called to be concerned about one another in order to promote love and good works. Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethern to dwell together in unity. Our first real steps toward unity are not toward those we naturally like. They're toward those we don't. Jesus unity only exists when those who stood sword to sword are now standing shoulder to shoulder.
The damage sin does in our heart cannot be reparied by a toolbox of talents or resources. Jesus is the only one who can provide for this need. If we know Jesus then his Holy Spirit is repairing our hearts. Christ's wisdom, grace and power can be released into every nook and cranny in our lives. We need God every day and in every way. As Believers, we're as dependant on his grace this moment as when we first believed. Each time we come to Jesus we realize how poor we are without him. Blessed are the poor in spirit for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these. To be poor in spirit is to be bankrupt totally dependent upon God at all times for all things. God's power is at work in the lives of those willing to live like this the question is will we live this way?
Precious moments with my cubbies
A few days ago, Dancing Cubbie was playing with a some change. She noted it said "In God we Trust" on it. She says, "Wooo whoo I got in God we trust money."
Crusin cubbie hears from us a lot "Make sure the truth is in you" So the other day at school a girl in his class was bragging and taking credit for something that she didn't do and Crusin told her "make sure the truth is in you" This is one of those times you had to see his little body language saying it to her. At least we know he hears and understands what we are talking about. Sometimes, it is challenging to tell what 4 and 5 year old boys can repeat and what they really understand.
This morning we had KLove on and we were in 3 different rooms but all singing the same song. As I walked out of the room, I just listened to the voices of my cubbies worshipping and drank in the moment. Dancing stopped singing to concentrate on tying her shoes.
Crusin all the sudden exclaims, "He opened my heart."
Just checking I ask, "Who opened your heart?"
Dancing interjects with the I can't believe you are asking who attitude that she gets honest from both parents, "Jesus did mom." The best feeling in the world seeing my children trust in the Lord.
Yesterday, for the first time in over 2 years I sat at my keyboard and played. I could play the notes. I was pleased that if I missed the correct note that I'd learned to play through without trying to go back and fix my mistake. But I totally forgot how to go between cords I couldn't go from an F to a G and I didn't even try A,B,D. I still had the C and could go from C to F or G. So not all was lost. I played 'Love me Tender' Cruisin was playing with other instruments while I was playing so I didn't think he'd paid any attention to me. Later in the day, Dancing came in and was thrilled to see the keyboard had new energy(batteries). She got permission to play and proceeded to do so while we parents talked in another room. Cruisin comes in and states, "Mom, Dancing is trying to play music on the keyboard but you are going to have to teach her how to do it the 'right way'." I guess I musn't have sounded too rusty after all.
Crusin cubbie hears from us a lot "Make sure the truth is in you" So the other day at school a girl in his class was bragging and taking credit for something that she didn't do and Crusin told her "make sure the truth is in you" This is one of those times you had to see his little body language saying it to her. At least we know he hears and understands what we are talking about. Sometimes, it is challenging to tell what 4 and 5 year old boys can repeat and what they really understand.
This morning we had KLove on and we were in 3 different rooms but all singing the same song. As I walked out of the room, I just listened to the voices of my cubbies worshipping and drank in the moment. Dancing stopped singing to concentrate on tying her shoes.
Crusin all the sudden exclaims, "He opened my heart."
Just checking I ask, "Who opened your heart?"
Dancing interjects with the I can't believe you are asking who attitude that she gets honest from both parents, "Jesus did mom." The best feeling in the world seeing my children trust in the Lord.
Yesterday, for the first time in over 2 years I sat at my keyboard and played. I could play the notes. I was pleased that if I missed the correct note that I'd learned to play through without trying to go back and fix my mistake. But I totally forgot how to go between cords I couldn't go from an F to a G and I didn't even try A,B,D. I still had the C and could go from C to F or G. So not all was lost. I played 'Love me Tender' Cruisin was playing with other instruments while I was playing so I didn't think he'd paid any attention to me. Later in the day, Dancing came in and was thrilled to see the keyboard had new energy(batteries). She got permission to play and proceeded to do so while we parents talked in another room. Cruisin comes in and states, "Mom, Dancing is trying to play music on the keyboard but you are going to have to teach her how to do it the 'right way'." I guess I musn't have sounded too rusty after all.
Crossing paths
Last night was the first of a series of classes I am taking through the Parks and Recreation on composting. I was so happy to see my friend Yvonne teaching the course. I first met Yvonne years ago, she helped me through the process of deciding to euthanize Bosley. I really respect Yvonne because she never pressed me to think what she thought. She honored the fact I am my own person on a journey just like she is on a journey and she gave me options and the time, as long as I needed to come to the decision that worked best for my family. It took me 6 months from the time she first spoke to me about euthanasia to come to terms with the idea. In some cases, it has to be done as heart breaking as it is/was.
I took Huggie back to her to help get the Crazy he was first named with under control. During this period she had better control of him than I did at first. As a student under an excellent teacher I generally learn quickly. And I did learn so much. One day, she acted as though she had a better handle on my dog than me only to discover he was really crazy in social situations and just needed lots of practice. I learned to be a better handler of wild dog behavior because Yvonne was willing to share what she knew without acting like she was better than me. Some things in life are just challenging no matter who we are. Sometimes all of us think we can handle something better than someone else only to discover we don't know any better than the next guy and it will just take time and practice. Huggie and I are on really good terms these days. I've learned to relax and a bigger lesson learned was to make sure I am working in the right fields at the right time. Rory was right in our early conversations about adding a dog, it would have been better to wait. Then came J and she is a perfect fit for our family. Had I waited we would have life pretty easy as her exercise needs are easy to meet. Huggie is a great dog and J helps keep him exercised, but he is consistently on the list of things to take care. But for the most part he is a happy dog, a jealous, attention seeking dog but his happiness is contagious and we all enjoy having him around.
So, Yvonne was teaching the compost class. I am so glad our paths crossed again. Yvonne is someone I'd love to hang around yet our schedules are full and our lives are full of diverse activities yet some of them overlap. She works tirelessly in the area of her two degrees. She lives considerably North of where we are located as well. So as we entered the class last night there were beverages and at that moment I don't know what I was thinking I took a cup of coffee. It was 6:30 pm. Those of you who know me well know I can't drink coffee past 10 am without having excess energy from it disturbing my ability to sleep. So, low on sleep but not really tired. I do still have some excess energy from the extra caffeine yesterday. I haven't had any yet this morning but I made a cup because for some reason I love the routine it means morning to me. My way to say Thank you for a new day Lord.
I took Huggie back to her to help get the Crazy he was first named with under control. During this period she had better control of him than I did at first. As a student under an excellent teacher I generally learn quickly. And I did learn so much. One day, she acted as though she had a better handle on my dog than me only to discover he was really crazy in social situations and just needed lots of practice. I learned to be a better handler of wild dog behavior because Yvonne was willing to share what she knew without acting like she was better than me. Some things in life are just challenging no matter who we are. Sometimes all of us think we can handle something better than someone else only to discover we don't know any better than the next guy and it will just take time and practice. Huggie and I are on really good terms these days. I've learned to relax and a bigger lesson learned was to make sure I am working in the right fields at the right time. Rory was right in our early conversations about adding a dog, it would have been better to wait. Then came J and she is a perfect fit for our family. Had I waited we would have life pretty easy as her exercise needs are easy to meet. Huggie is a great dog and J helps keep him exercised, but he is consistently on the list of things to take care. But for the most part he is a happy dog, a jealous, attention seeking dog but his happiness is contagious and we all enjoy having him around.
So, Yvonne was teaching the compost class. I am so glad our paths crossed again. Yvonne is someone I'd love to hang around yet our schedules are full and our lives are full of diverse activities yet some of them overlap. She works tirelessly in the area of her two degrees. She lives considerably North of where we are located as well. So as we entered the class last night there were beverages and at that moment I don't know what I was thinking I took a cup of coffee. It was 6:30 pm. Those of you who know me well know I can't drink coffee past 10 am without having excess energy from it disturbing my ability to sleep. So, low on sleep but not really tired. I do still have some excess energy from the extra caffeine yesterday. I haven't had any yet this morning but I made a cup because for some reason I love the routine it means morning to me. My way to say Thank you for a new day Lord.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Chocolate topped nut cookies
My mom's chocolate topped nut cookie recipe for sweet Emily!
1 1/2 c. flour
1tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup shortening
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tsp vanilla
1 egg
1 cup chopped nuts
Melted chocolate or just top hot cookies with a few chocolate chips and spread as they melt
Mix all ingredients but chocolate. Drop by teaspoonfuls on greased baking sheets, with spoon make hallows in center of each cookie. Bake at 375 for 10 minutes. Drop melted chocolate by teaspoonfuls or chips into hollows. I also used melted white chocolate on the cookies I made for you. Enjoy!
1 1/2 c. flour
1tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup shortening
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tsp vanilla
1 egg
1 cup chopped nuts
Melted chocolate or just top hot cookies with a few chocolate chips and spread as they melt
Mix all ingredients but chocolate. Drop by teaspoonfuls on greased baking sheets, with spoon make hallows in center of each cookie. Bake at 375 for 10 minutes. Drop melted chocolate by teaspoonfuls or chips into hollows. I also used melted white chocolate on the cookies I made for you. Enjoy!
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Cream cheese filled cupcakes
Papa Bear's favorite birthday treat (Recipe credit goes to Connie Stanzak from way back in the day)
Prepare your favorite choc cake recipe (if using a box don't use a pudding cake)
Filling:
Mix:
1-8 oz package cream cheese
6oz choc chips
1/3 c. sugar
1 egg
Fill cupcake cups 1/3 of the way with cake batter, put a heaping Tbs. of cream cheese filling on top of that, cover with more cake batter. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes. ENJOY GOOD EATS!~
This year we decided we are going to try this with carrot cake and without the chocolate chips in the filling probably for Easter.
Prepare your favorite choc cake recipe (if using a box don't use a pudding cake)
Filling:
Mix:
1-8 oz package cream cheese
6oz choc chips
1/3 c. sugar
1 egg
Fill cupcake cups 1/3 of the way with cake batter, put a heaping Tbs. of cream cheese filling on top of that, cover with more cake batter. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes. ENJOY GOOD EATS!~
This year we decided we are going to try this with carrot cake and without the chocolate chips in the filling probably for Easter.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Best friends
Today, I got a call from a neighbor who I know God has called me to serve. This is a relationship that I struggle with at times, truth be told most times. My neighbor has the potential to be one of the quickest witted, humorous, generous individuals I’ve met. She also has journeyed down a road filled with much personal pain. Pain that often traps her and zaps the strength of the Lord right out of her. Tonight, I was proud of her as she shared a story with me about her daughter writing a letter to another woman, friend, confidant that had passed. Out of the letter my neighbor said, “I want to be a better mother and I am going to do it in baby steps as the Lord directs.” I was so proud of her and told her so. Mother daughter relationships can be one of the most fulfilling relationships in life and they also can be one filled with the most pain. They are definitely worth taking baby steps to make better.
What got to me most in the conversation though was when she said, “This could be a letter to a mother but it also could be a letter to a friend, a best friend, like you or …..and she named two of her other best friends that are her age.” Her comment got to me because as far as being a good friend I fail so often in this relationship. As dear as my neighbor is to me she isn’t someone I’d call my best friend. But interestingly enough, she considers me a best friend. And I guess this is a call to me to really look at how I treat others because if they are going to consider me a best friend I need to walk worthy of being considered a best friend at all times.
What got to me most in the conversation though was when she said, “This could be a letter to a mother but it also could be a letter to a friend, a best friend, like you or …..and she named two of her other best friends that are her age.” Her comment got to me because as far as being a good friend I fail so often in this relationship. As dear as my neighbor is to me she isn’t someone I’d call my best friend. But interestingly enough, she considers me a best friend. And I guess this is a call to me to really look at how I treat others because if they are going to consider me a best friend I need to walk worthy of being considered a best friend at all times.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Practice, practice, practice.....
Do you ever struggle being content on the days when God asks you to wait? I certainly have had this as an issue in my lifetime. Yesterday, I had the distinct pleasure of being reminded by an awesome God that he knew exactly where I was and met me in my practice. Waiting gives us an opportunity to develop trust. Can that be built up in preparation for times of trouble was my question? If we practice trust in the Lord during the quiet days when nothing much seems to be happening, when the storms come that practice can keep us in His peace.
Two years ago, I met a man at my front door selling the Tribune. I wasn't interested but something about this guy and the children he was working toward supporting by his selling of the Trib let me know I was to take his offer.
We sat in our front porch area. I had been struggling with anxiety for some time especially when I was well aware of God using me in certain situations. I would rush ahead and crash or let fear stop me from moving forward. This gentleman shared with me a story about his Aunt. Well, first he said, "Do you meditate?" In that moment my anxiety kicked in 'oh no I am not participating in some eastern ooommmming. " But it was important to listen and not anticipate! (Thank you Emmaus-Don't anticipate!)
He shared that his Aunt, the Catholic nun, had taught him years ago to recite, "Be still and know that I am God" in his peaceful times as a practice until he could call on that verse and it held him in the positions God called him to hold that would have caused him anxiety issues otherwise.
There are so many places I can go from here but as I shared with Barb the other day and she put it so clearly when she said, "You want the best field to work in " Yes, Lord the one that will be fruitful and for your glory!" And as Tim said, "Leadership is not a destination but a portion of the journey."
I can share of all my failings in positions of leadership, I've been blessed to hold throughout my life from my earliest memories in first grade." When the Lord himself spoke through a wonderful woman and said, "I did not give you this power to do what you want with it, I gave it that you would use it for my purposes." It is good to recall my failings not to put myself down but to remember my position in relation to HIS. He will listen to the list of failings but the call is still a call and his response is "I make all things New!" This I know to be true...life is fragile and power misused can destroy life. So take my hand Lord and lead this Dance!
Two years ago, I met a man at my front door selling the Tribune. I wasn't interested but something about this guy and the children he was working toward supporting by his selling of the Trib let me know I was to take his offer.
We sat in our front porch area. I had been struggling with anxiety for some time especially when I was well aware of God using me in certain situations. I would rush ahead and crash or let fear stop me from moving forward. This gentleman shared with me a story about his Aunt. Well, first he said, "Do you meditate?" In that moment my anxiety kicked in 'oh no I am not participating in some eastern ooommmming. " But it was important to listen and not anticipate! (Thank you Emmaus-Don't anticipate!)
He shared that his Aunt, the Catholic nun, had taught him years ago to recite, "Be still and know that I am God" in his peaceful times as a practice until he could call on that verse and it held him in the positions God called him to hold that would have caused him anxiety issues otherwise.
There are so many places I can go from here but as I shared with Barb the other day and she put it so clearly when she said, "You want the best field to work in " Yes, Lord the one that will be fruitful and for your glory!" And as Tim said, "Leadership is not a destination but a portion of the journey."
I can share of all my failings in positions of leadership, I've been blessed to hold throughout my life from my earliest memories in first grade." When the Lord himself spoke through a wonderful woman and said, "I did not give you this power to do what you want with it, I gave it that you would use it for my purposes." It is good to recall my failings not to put myself down but to remember my position in relation to HIS. He will listen to the list of failings but the call is still a call and his response is "I make all things New!" This I know to be true...life is fragile and power misused can destroy life. So take my hand Lord and lead this Dance!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Recipe for pumpkin oatmeal
This recipe is for those of us who should eat oatmeal everyday but can't quite bring ourselves to suffer for what is right for the health of our bodies. Really, it is an oatmeal that is yumlicious and good for you. As one friend said it's like eating a dessert rather than mushy oatmeal. I like Bob's organic whole oatmeal for this recipe the best but any old fashioned oat will do....
Pumpkin Oatmeal
1 c. old fashion oats
1 T. flax seed
2.5 T. brown sugar
1/2t cinnamon
1/4 t allspice
1/8 t nutmeg
1/2 t lemon zest (or not)
combine above ingredients in a bowl
Whisk in a separate bowl
1/2 t vanilla
3/4 cup pumpkin puree
3/4 cup milk
if you wish 2t. butter I skip this for heart healthy reasons comeon I am trying to do what's right for my heart here.
Combine two lists put in ramekins or small bowls able to endure the oven. Bake at 375 for 10 minutes pull out, add topping if you desire.
Topping:
1/4 cup crushed pecans
2 t butter
1T sugar
Bake 7 minutes-cool 5 minutes top with milk and /or raisins and enjoy!
Pumpkin Oatmeal
1 c. old fashion oats
1 T. flax seed
2.5 T. brown sugar
1/2t cinnamon
1/4 t allspice
1/8 t nutmeg
1/2 t lemon zest (or not)
combine above ingredients in a bowl
Whisk in a separate bowl
1/2 t vanilla
3/4 cup pumpkin puree
3/4 cup milk
if you wish 2t. butter I skip this for heart healthy reasons comeon I am trying to do what's right for my heart here.
Combine two lists put in ramekins or small bowls able to endure the oven. Bake at 375 for 10 minutes pull out, add topping if you desire.
Topping:
1/4 cup crushed pecans
2 t butter
1T sugar
Bake 7 minutes-cool 5 minutes top with milk and /or raisins and enjoy!
Monday, February 28, 2011
Gleaning growth in a relationship
It occurred to me today, while I was refereeing the cubbies as they played that if we choose righteousness over 'being right' someone else may have the opportunity to learn (glean) something new through the experience. Dancing cubbie knew her way would work while cruisin cubbie wanted desperately to be heard and try things another way in their play. This has been a long held pattern that we are guilty of supporting as we encouraged our younger child to look to his older sister for sound advice.
In order to get dancing cubbie to show any respect for her brother in this play period required a time away from the play room to talk which was met with enormous rebellion. Ah....I know I've been there not wanting to give up my right to be right.
Interestingly enough cruisin cubbie took it upon himself to leave the playroom as well and sat near dancing cubbie to "wait on her". Since, she was in no space near wanting to listen or compromise. I encouraged cruisin cubbie to continue to play. I joined him for a bit. This resulted in more misbehavior for attention by dancing cubbie, which was met by Grizzly. In the end, dancing cubbie's resistance broke. You know the face, only a mother could love. As she used my shoulder as her kleenex I noted that even I had an opportunity to grow as I comforted her and assured her that she was loved. Those of you who know me well know I dislike snot very much, even touching kleenex that's been used by others freaks me out, so being used as one hasn't been an option up to this moment.
What I wanted my daughter to know at that moment in her brokenness was that it's through failure, weakness and neediness that we learn to rely on God. I came to realize that true dependence isn't asking God to bless what we've decided to do. It is coming to the Lord with open heart and mind, inviting him to plant his desires within us. When he infuses us with a dream so far beyond our reach. One we know we can't achieve alone thus begins our journey of profound reliance on Christ.
In the moment when asking dancing cubbie to consider cruisin cubbie's ideas, it simply seemed the right thing to do. Especially in the light of the call that we are to practice putting other's needs above our own. As the day progressed I was able to see that this experience was a form of gleaning in a relationship which was an answer to prayer.
Then, as I wrote this I remembered a sweet memory from the day prior where cruisin cubbie asked,
"Mom, do I have wisdom"
"Yes, cubbie some."
" I think I need more."
"All you have to do is ask Jesus"
And this led cruisin cubbie to pray the sweetest, heart felt prayer requesting more wisdom" As I reflected on all of this information I am humbled how my son is willing to 'wait on' his older sister just like Jesus the gentleman, he doesn't push himself on anyone and he doesn't push from behind. He sits with and hopes even after he's been mistreated by the person he's waiting on. I am so thankful for the lessons the Lord teaches us through our children!
In order to get dancing cubbie to show any respect for her brother in this play period required a time away from the play room to talk which was met with enormous rebellion. Ah....I know I've been there not wanting to give up my right to be right.
Interestingly enough cruisin cubbie took it upon himself to leave the playroom as well and sat near dancing cubbie to "wait on her". Since, she was in no space near wanting to listen or compromise. I encouraged cruisin cubbie to continue to play. I joined him for a bit. This resulted in more misbehavior for attention by dancing cubbie, which was met by Grizzly. In the end, dancing cubbie's resistance broke. You know the face, only a mother could love. As she used my shoulder as her kleenex I noted that even I had an opportunity to grow as I comforted her and assured her that she was loved. Those of you who know me well know I dislike snot very much, even touching kleenex that's been used by others freaks me out, so being used as one hasn't been an option up to this moment.
What I wanted my daughter to know at that moment in her brokenness was that it's through failure, weakness and neediness that we learn to rely on God. I came to realize that true dependence isn't asking God to bless what we've decided to do. It is coming to the Lord with open heart and mind, inviting him to plant his desires within us. When he infuses us with a dream so far beyond our reach. One we know we can't achieve alone thus begins our journey of profound reliance on Christ.
In the moment when asking dancing cubbie to consider cruisin cubbie's ideas, it simply seemed the right thing to do. Especially in the light of the call that we are to practice putting other's needs above our own. As the day progressed I was able to see that this experience was a form of gleaning in a relationship which was an answer to prayer.
Then, as I wrote this I remembered a sweet memory from the day prior where cruisin cubbie asked,
"Mom, do I have wisdom"
"Yes, cubbie some."
" I think I need more."
"All you have to do is ask Jesus"
And this led cruisin cubbie to pray the sweetest, heart felt prayer requesting more wisdom" As I reflected on all of this information I am humbled how my son is willing to 'wait on' his older sister just like Jesus the gentleman, he doesn't push himself on anyone and he doesn't push from behind. He sits with and hopes even after he's been mistreated by the person he's waiting on. I am so thankful for the lessons the Lord teaches us through our children!
Friday, February 25, 2011
Drop the ball
"You are my friends if you obey me. I no longer call you servants because a master doesn't confide in his servants. Now, you are my friends, since I have told you everyting the Father told me. You didn't choose me, I chose you! I appointed you to go and produce fruit that will last, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask for, using my name. I command you to love each other." (Niv bible)
Wow! 4 lines that could take a life time to fully appreciate, but isn't that the way of the bible full of richness beyond what we can fully comprehend. Now, this verse gets me thinking about relationships. Ours to the Son, the Son to the Father, the wife to the husband, the siblings, family members, friend to friend
and the saved to the unsaved.
Yes, to the saved...... Jesus chose us. We didn't choose him. When he chose us he appointed us to go...produce fruit that will last. Sounds good, but in practice it can be grueling. Consider that last disagreement we've had with anyone or try to forgive someone who has so wronged us, or the mistreatment to us by those living in the world.
When my cubbies get in a power struggle, we often tell them someone has to 'drop the ball'. If we are playing ball with someone and they throw that ball too hard at us we can always drop the ball and walk away from the game to keep the peace. Just as if we are arguing with someone we can drop the ball, walk away and not respond.
I learned this a number of years ago in a different way, I read when being stuck by the barbs of someone's harsh words if you don't squeal they will stop sticking you..(yes, I was the pig so easily stuck and I was tired of being the pig!) So, I tried this in my most provoking relationship and you know what I got a greater degree of respect from the one who used to stick me for fun. Of course, when I initially quit squealing there was another reaction which included an agressive entrance into my personal space. By the power of the Holy Spirit and his promise "I have conquered the world and deprived it of the power to harm you." I stood my ground without retaliation and held on to "I am trusting you Jesus." You know what, it was the agressor who took a step back and peace was had by both of us. Now, that is fruit that will last.
I like the last line which is to those of us who claim friendship with the one who calls us his friend...it isn't a suggestion it is a command..."I command you to love each other." This again is sometimes easier to hear than to follow through with actions. This is something liberating I learned from the Emmaus walk to be honest in our prayers...sometimes we have to confess to the Lord that we really don't like his children...those he's called us to serve. Sometimes they are difficult, sometimes they push us to grow and we don't like it, sometimes they think they know something more than maybe what we already have learned but God has asked us to love and forgive not slap the one who exalts themselves over us. "I am trusting you Jesus!" And the great news is that "You oh Lord have overcome the world and deprived it of the power to harm me."
Wow! 4 lines that could take a life time to fully appreciate, but isn't that the way of the bible full of richness beyond what we can fully comprehend. Now, this verse gets me thinking about relationships. Ours to the Son, the Son to the Father, the wife to the husband, the siblings, family members, friend to friend
and the saved to the unsaved.
Yes, to the saved...... Jesus chose us. We didn't choose him. When he chose us he appointed us to go...produce fruit that will last. Sounds good, but in practice it can be grueling. Consider that last disagreement we've had with anyone or try to forgive someone who has so wronged us, or the mistreatment to us by those living in the world.
When my cubbies get in a power struggle, we often tell them someone has to 'drop the ball'. If we are playing ball with someone and they throw that ball too hard at us we can always drop the ball and walk away from the game to keep the peace. Just as if we are arguing with someone we can drop the ball, walk away and not respond.
I learned this a number of years ago in a different way, I read when being stuck by the barbs of someone's harsh words if you don't squeal they will stop sticking you..(yes, I was the pig so easily stuck and I was tired of being the pig!) So, I tried this in my most provoking relationship and you know what I got a greater degree of respect from the one who used to stick me for fun. Of course, when I initially quit squealing there was another reaction which included an agressive entrance into my personal space. By the power of the Holy Spirit and his promise "I have conquered the world and deprived it of the power to harm you." I stood my ground without retaliation and held on to "I am trusting you Jesus." You know what, it was the agressor who took a step back and peace was had by both of us. Now, that is fruit that will last.
I like the last line which is to those of us who claim friendship with the one who calls us his friend...it isn't a suggestion it is a command..."I command you to love each other." This again is sometimes easier to hear than to follow through with actions. This is something liberating I learned from the Emmaus walk to be honest in our prayers...sometimes we have to confess to the Lord that we really don't like his children...those he's called us to serve. Sometimes they are difficult, sometimes they push us to grow and we don't like it, sometimes they think they know something more than maybe what we already have learned but God has asked us to love and forgive not slap the one who exalts themselves over us. "I am trusting you Jesus!" And the great news is that "You oh Lord have overcome the world and deprived it of the power to harm me."
Lord, what does leaving a portion unplowed for gleaners look like today?
This week in bible study we learned that as Christians we are to leave a portion of our fields unplowed and allow them to be gleaned by those who need. I was left to wonder what that would look like in my life and had the boldness to come to the Lord's throne of grace and ask him what does that mean for me here today? Well, I think he answered a portion of that question in the past two days. Thursday morning while in prayer and devotional time, I was keenly aware that I needed to leave some time open this week to just be, to just hang out with my family without an agenda. The only time this week that was a possibility was Saturday til 5:30ish. So, I said "Lord no matter what is offered I promise to leave Saturday open for this longing in my soul."
Later thursday afternoon, my friend Lady Di called to say, "I have these 4 tickets to the theater, I will give them to your family so you can go to the theater." I was so grateful she thought of us I said, "We'd love them." Then, I remembered my promise and that Grizz;y wouldn't be able to join us because he will be leaving before 6 to dine with friends for his birthday celebration. I recanted my former statement and explained the situation thanking her for thinking of us in the first place. I was honored she had considered us for this neat gift.
Then, today Grizzly and dancing cubbie were going to go a father daughter dance tonight. However, dancing cubbie ended up with a fever that kept her home from school. If we miss school, we miss fun activities after school too. I had planned for cubbie bear to go on a play date with friends while another friend(Nanax4) was planning on blessing me with tickets to the Lincoln Brewster concert. It is Grizzly's birthday today! Well, since his plans were cancelled, I didn't think it would be a good plan to leave him with no party and sick kids on his birthday. So, Nanax4 called me minutes before I was going to call her to tell her of my plan to not go. The good news is that she had others waiting in line to glean the ticket.
So, today I have a clearer understanding of what gleaning means in my life as far as staying socially active with events. I am interested in how that looks with relationships, ministry, family etc. By choosing not to plow to the edge of my social activity field at least 5 other people will experience blessing this week. I can see if I step back in service that others will have an opportunity to expand and serve. I see if I can't get back to this or that friend that God has them covered and it may allow someone to expand a relationship with someone else who can meet a need differently or better than I could meet a need. It seems like a humbling act that would bring great peace to one's life. As well as allow others to have some of the harvest.....if all of us Christians were honorable and chose not to plow our entire fields do you think it would allow the Lord to fed the hungry, heal the broken hearted and set some of the captives free?
Later thursday afternoon, my friend Lady Di called to say, "I have these 4 tickets to the theater, I will give them to your family so you can go to the theater." I was so grateful she thought of us I said, "We'd love them." Then, I remembered my promise and that Grizz;y wouldn't be able to join us because he will be leaving before 6 to dine with friends for his birthday celebration. I recanted my former statement and explained the situation thanking her for thinking of us in the first place. I was honored she had considered us for this neat gift.
Then, today Grizzly and dancing cubbie were going to go a father daughter dance tonight. However, dancing cubbie ended up with a fever that kept her home from school. If we miss school, we miss fun activities after school too. I had planned for cubbie bear to go on a play date with friends while another friend(Nanax4) was planning on blessing me with tickets to the Lincoln Brewster concert. It is Grizzly's birthday today! Well, since his plans were cancelled, I didn't think it would be a good plan to leave him with no party and sick kids on his birthday. So, Nanax4 called me minutes before I was going to call her to tell her of my plan to not go. The good news is that she had others waiting in line to glean the ticket.
So, today I have a clearer understanding of what gleaning means in my life as far as staying socially active with events. I am interested in how that looks with relationships, ministry, family etc. By choosing not to plow to the edge of my social activity field at least 5 other people will experience blessing this week. I can see if I step back in service that others will have an opportunity to expand and serve. I see if I can't get back to this or that friend that God has them covered and it may allow someone to expand a relationship with someone else who can meet a need differently or better than I could meet a need. It seems like a humbling act that would bring great peace to one's life. As well as allow others to have some of the harvest.....if all of us Christians were honorable and chose not to plow our entire fields do you think it would allow the Lord to fed the hungry, heal the broken hearted and set some of the captives free?
Monday, February 21, 2011
Relinquishing the right to be 'right'
Tonight my Grizzly Bear came in from work and dancing cubbie says, "Dad, what's wrong with your eye?"
I go to investigate and his eyes are goopy and red. So, I inquire,
"Are you going to go to the Doctor?" asked with concern.
"They are closed" he responds
"Urgent care is open" I am hopeful.
"I'll be fine."
Well, this left me uneasy and a bit angry. Now those of you who know me well know this is a challenging area for me that I have been working on for a number of years. With the help of the Holy Spirit leading me in wisdom I prayed...."Lord I need peace or loose my tongue to say what needs to be said." Well, he loosed my tongue, firmly but kindly without pressure. Without going into details, when I finished speaking I had complete peace. I said what needed to be said and relinquished the right to be right. Now read on to see how the Lord blessed the rest of the evening.
A bit later I needed to clean the restrooms, as I'd been gone 4 days, on the Emmaus walk and have a 5 year old son. Enough said.
I passed Grizzly in the cubbies restroom while searching for the scrubbing bubbles. Something about scrubbing bubbles makes cleaning bathrooms almost fun! I know not the best for the environment, but if it helps motivate me to keep those bathrooms clean, I say Getter Done. Grizzly was washing his eyes with water. I asked if he'd tried eye drops. He said he tried my rewetting solution for contacts to no avail. I shared I didn't think that would work he'd probably need something like Visine. Then, proceeded to hunt down the scrubbing bubbles.
As I began cleaning the downstairs bathroom, it occurred to me we didn't have any Visine. Grizzly passed the doorway and I called to him.
Looking directly into his face I asked, "Do you want me to go to the store for Visine or something like that for your eyes?" He let me serve him this way. In the Spirit of Agape, which was another big lesson from Emmaus, by the Grace of God at 70% off the original price, I found a heart shaped box full of Whitman's chocolates that sang, "You're still the One". Just two weeks, ago Grizzly had mentioned we should get Motown for our music collection because we both like it. As with most things, we have bi-polar interests in music. He listens primarily to AC/DC, Pink Floyd and the like, I listen to primarily Christian music and let's not forget tons of kiddie songs. If you could have seen his smile and face shine bright like the sun as the box of chocolates sang to him. It was totally worth not being right! An added bonus is the bathrooms are shinning too.
I go to investigate and his eyes are goopy and red. So, I inquire,
"Are you going to go to the Doctor?" asked with concern.
"They are closed" he responds
"Urgent care is open" I am hopeful.
"I'll be fine."
Well, this left me uneasy and a bit angry. Now those of you who know me well know this is a challenging area for me that I have been working on for a number of years. With the help of the Holy Spirit leading me in wisdom I prayed...."Lord I need peace or loose my tongue to say what needs to be said." Well, he loosed my tongue, firmly but kindly without pressure. Without going into details, when I finished speaking I had complete peace. I said what needed to be said and relinquished the right to be right. Now read on to see how the Lord blessed the rest of the evening.
A bit later I needed to clean the restrooms, as I'd been gone 4 days, on the Emmaus walk and have a 5 year old son. Enough said.
I passed Grizzly in the cubbies restroom while searching for the scrubbing bubbles. Something about scrubbing bubbles makes cleaning bathrooms almost fun! I know not the best for the environment, but if it helps motivate me to keep those bathrooms clean, I say Getter Done. Grizzly was washing his eyes with water. I asked if he'd tried eye drops. He said he tried my rewetting solution for contacts to no avail. I shared I didn't think that would work he'd probably need something like Visine. Then, proceeded to hunt down the scrubbing bubbles.
As I began cleaning the downstairs bathroom, it occurred to me we didn't have any Visine. Grizzly passed the doorway and I called to him.
Looking directly into his face I asked, "Do you want me to go to the store for Visine or something like that for your eyes?" He let me serve him this way. In the Spirit of Agape, which was another big lesson from Emmaus, by the Grace of God at 70% off the original price, I found a heart shaped box full of Whitman's chocolates that sang, "You're still the One". Just two weeks, ago Grizzly had mentioned we should get Motown for our music collection because we both like it. As with most things, we have bi-polar interests in music. He listens primarily to AC/DC, Pink Floyd and the like, I listen to primarily Christian music and let's not forget tons of kiddie songs. If you could have seen his smile and face shine bright like the sun as the box of chocolates sang to him. It was totally worth not being right! An added bonus is the bathrooms are shinning too.
Emmaus
I just had the most lovely experience as a pilgrim in the Greater Dayton Walk to Emmaus. I came away with so much and am still processing much of what I heard, saw and experienced. I will tell you this our Lord is a gentleman, he does not push himself on us. What a blessing that is. He meets us where we are at and he woos us. And because of this I declare: As for me, when I am poor and feeling heavy, your help, O Lord, will lift me up. I wait patiently, trusting that you will lift me up. This experience was like a great housekeeping experience. You know those dust bunnies in the corners behind the furniture (good things in your heart) well the Holy Spirit did some sweeping. I woke to realize that He honored a prayer from months ago, when I confessed I didn't know how to move shame out of my heart. He moved it and I am surrounded by a host of witnesses who are praying that I leave it in his capable hands.
An Emmaus walk is a personal journey into a deeper relationship with our Lord and Savior. I encourage anyone seeking a more intimate walk with our Lord to consider an Emmaus Walk. In a year, I would be honored to sponsor you.
An Emmaus walk is a personal journey into a deeper relationship with our Lord and Savior. I encourage anyone seeking a more intimate walk with our Lord to consider an Emmaus Walk. In a year, I would be honored to sponsor you.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Seasons
Psalm 25:4 Shew me thy ways, O Lord; teach me thy paths.
The seasons are changing from Winter to Spring. Spring is full of new life waiting to blossom. I see buds all around. Life is seasonal. There is a time and a season for everything. I can't do everything at once, nor should I. The questions at this point in my life is what should I be doing? I understand that I am in a season of life now where I definitely want to be working in the right fields. Teach me the best pathway for my life Lord.
Jesus did not heal everyone. He did not meet the needs of all the poor or cast out all demons. I cannot meet every need I am aware of, I cannot exploit every opportunity. Shew me the fields you want me to tend dear Lord.
The goal of the world in regards to life management is to enable us to do more in less time. It is all around us from fast food, microwaves, ready made meals, drive through banking, children writing 6 sentence paragraphs in first grade, teach your baby to read, kindergarten's graduating (no matter how cute it is to see those little pumpkins wearing a cap and gown shouldn't that remain a right of passage?) But is this necessarily a desirable goal? Perhaps we need to get less done, but the right things in the right seasons.
Two years ago, I was moved to pray for foster children who age out of the system without the foundation of a permanent family. In the past two years, I have seen God's hand move allowing me to meet foster parents and parents waiting to add another child to their families. Yesterday, the Lord showed me through my friend who fosters the life of a child whose life could be one of constant transition without the permanence of family to support and be his biggest fan. I have volunteered to work in the field of this child's life and I wonder if God would like me....us to provide care for more children within our community by beginning the foster care process. We may be far from perfect over here in the land of the Grizzlies, however we do have a strong foundation and family all by the gracious favor of our Lord and Savior. Papa Bear is full of the most joy when he is surrounded by his cubbies and their friends, albeit he doesn't see it yet. The smile on his face reflects his joy in those moments. I, too love having many voices sitting around our table and when my friends children come to visit 5 or more at a time and surround our table with smiles, happy hearts and stories from their day it doesn't get any better than that. Shew me thy way Lord, teach me thy paths.....help me to work in the fields with ground ready to receive the seeds that will produce a fruitful harvest and may you guide me to emptying my silos properly when I am called to do so. Praise God for he is Lord of the Harvest!
The seasons are changing from Winter to Spring. Spring is full of new life waiting to blossom. I see buds all around. Life is seasonal. There is a time and a season for everything. I can't do everything at once, nor should I. The questions at this point in my life is what should I be doing? I understand that I am in a season of life now where I definitely want to be working in the right fields. Teach me the best pathway for my life Lord.
Jesus did not heal everyone. He did not meet the needs of all the poor or cast out all demons. I cannot meet every need I am aware of, I cannot exploit every opportunity. Shew me the fields you want me to tend dear Lord.
The goal of the world in regards to life management is to enable us to do more in less time. It is all around us from fast food, microwaves, ready made meals, drive through banking, children writing 6 sentence paragraphs in first grade, teach your baby to read, kindergarten's graduating (no matter how cute it is to see those little pumpkins wearing a cap and gown shouldn't that remain a right of passage?) But is this necessarily a desirable goal? Perhaps we need to get less done, but the right things in the right seasons.
Two years ago, I was moved to pray for foster children who age out of the system without the foundation of a permanent family. In the past two years, I have seen God's hand move allowing me to meet foster parents and parents waiting to add another child to their families. Yesterday, the Lord showed me through my friend who fosters the life of a child whose life could be one of constant transition without the permanence of family to support and be his biggest fan. I have volunteered to work in the field of this child's life and I wonder if God would like me....us to provide care for more children within our community by beginning the foster care process. We may be far from perfect over here in the land of the Grizzlies, however we do have a strong foundation and family all by the gracious favor of our Lord and Savior. Papa Bear is full of the most joy when he is surrounded by his cubbies and their friends, albeit he doesn't see it yet. The smile on his face reflects his joy in those moments. I, too love having many voices sitting around our table and when my friends children come to visit 5 or more at a time and surround our table with smiles, happy hearts and stories from their day it doesn't get any better than that. Shew me thy way Lord, teach me thy paths.....help me to work in the fields with ground ready to receive the seeds that will produce a fruitful harvest and may you guide me to emptying my silos properly when I am called to do so. Praise God for he is Lord of the Harvest!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Life Purpose Statement
I want to live my life purposely, regularly reviewing and praying over my purpose in life, radically loving God, cherishing and inspiring my husband and children, praying for them and keeping spiritually connected with my family, loving others and seeking to lay spiritual foundations in their lives.
I want to live faithfully, believing God for what I cannot see. I want to believe that God can do in my children's lives what I cannot do.
I want to live creatively, creating beauty and warmth in my home, around my table and in my areas of service.
I want to lvie paradoxically, I want to go against my selfish nature, against culture giving more than I feel like and going the 2nd mile to be like Jesus.
I want to live faithfully, believing God for what I cannot see. I want to believe that God can do in my children's lives what I cannot do.
I want to live creatively, creating beauty and warmth in my home, around my table and in my areas of service.
I want to lvie paradoxically, I want to go against my selfish nature, against culture giving more than I feel like and going the 2nd mile to be like Jesus.
With Thanksgiving
Do you ever fret with anxiety? I worry way too much. I am constantly seeking the Lord's grace in this area of my life. I take my worries to his feet, yes I pray. But something happens where thoughts bombard me and worry attempts to sneek back into my life and steal my joy. It drives me crazy! Hear some good news: "Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand." So, after I take all my worries to him in prayer asking him for what I need (peace) to keep that peace I am to thank him for all he has done and then I will experience God's peace, which I can assure you is wonderful. It is interesting to me how often the Good Lord has had to reteach me this lesson again and again in life. I thank Him for being full of grace, patient and full of loving kindness. I thank Him for drawing me to himself again and again.
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